Ok, so here's the recipe. Open up a can of Modelo and squeeze a lime up in there. For real, it's important, you'll see in a minute.
Toss some dark chicken pieces into a splash of oil (you can cut up bite-size pieces, or if you're lazy like me throw the thighs in whole). While the chicken is sauteing, get out your microplane, because it's pretty much all you'll need. Grate ginger, lemongrass, 2 hot thai chiles, and garlic. Watch out, those teeny Thai chiles are hot like whoa. Proportions are below (see, told you that Modelo would come in handy). A few pointers - I freeze ginger, thai chiles, and 4 inch pieces of lemongrass so I have them whenever I want. Also, lemongrass and chiles grate much better when they are frozen.
The lime is for the beer - not the soup:)
You can add more or less of any ingredient - I've added lemon juice in the past but it overwhelms the lemongrass. Once everything is grated, (it's not too important how cooked the chicken is at this point), add all the grated ingredients to the pan and swirl it around a bit. It's going to smell awesome.
Then get out the fish sauce - please, no subs, get over the smell - and add 2-3 Tbsp to the pan. It's going to smell even more awesome. Add about 4 cups chicken stock (you want enough to submerge the chicken - the more broth, the more soup to slurp). Let this simmer for 30 minutes or so, allowing the chicken thighs to become deliciously tender. You can add sliced red bell pepper at this point for more color/veggies to your meal. Taste and adjust the seasonings - I often add more fish sauce. Now it's time to add the NOODLES! Oh how I love noodles. This dish is best with the wide rice variety - I pick these up at the Asian food market, they look like this:
For awhile my Asian market only carried the COCK brand of these noodles. Ahem.
So, now you have two options. You can soak the rice noodles in a pan of warm water until they are soft, portion them out into a bowl, and ladle the lemongrass chicken and broth over the top OR you can be ridiculously lazy and just toss the noodles in the pan.
I'm lazy.
All that's left to do is garnish with crushed roasted peanuts, sliced scallions, and cilantro if you have it.
The cilantro makes the color pop at bit more, alas I was out.
So that's lemongrass chicken recipe - if you can call a narrative a recipe. I'm pretty bad at reading and following recipe directions, and nowhere is this more evident then when I try to bake a goddamned cake. Now, everyone knows baking is not cooking, and requires stringent adherence to the EXACT proportions laid out in the recipe. However, as I am apparently incapable of reading a full recipe and executing the instructions as directed, I have had some serious setbacks. First case: the Hostess Cupcake- Cake Debacle.
I love Hostess Cupcakes, in theory. Every once in awhile I'll cave and buy one, but they are never as good as I think they are. I'm not sure if this is because my tastes are growing more refined as I age (unlikely) or Hostess is cutting corners and and using sawdust and machine grease instead of flour and shortening (possibly). Anyway, you can see why I gravitated towards this cake. I don't really like frosting but I LURVE marshmallow fluff "frosting". The disaster started when I failed to note the asterisk stating my 9 inch pans required me to prepare 2/3 of the full batter recipe or I'd have overflow issues. Whoops - but I was smart, I decided to use the extra batter to make 6 cupcakes and bring them to school - spread the calories around. Note my results.
Cupcakes look worse than I do, which is saying something.
Not only did the cupcakes overflow, so did the cakes. Massively. I managed to get a cookie sheet in the oven to catch most of it, but Jesus what a mess. Coincidently, (and hilariously) overbaked chocolate cake overflow makes for excellent Stunt Turds:
Pretty realistic, huh!
I managed to salvage the whole thing somehow and it turned out pretty awesome. The Hostess Cupcake You Remember From Childhood, dare I say. Here is the link to the recipe, courtesy of Smitten Kitchen:
And finally, a photo of the result:
Mmmm marshmallow fluff.
So, I bet you're wondering where the silkworm pupa are. A couple weeks prior to making this cake, Mike and I made a trip to H Mart, this enormous, awesome Korean/Asian supermarket where he specifically asked for bundegi, or canned silkworm pupa. I like to think of myself as an adventurous eater, but Jesus people, there are ways to get your protein and then there are bugs that are meant to be smashed underfoot and left for the ants. Anyway, they are pretty common street vendor fare in Korea and Mikey likes em, so whatever. The same night Mike pan friend a can of PUPA, I made Italian-meringue fresh strawberry buttercream frosting for a friend's birthday cupcakes. The recipe (I also barely managed this one, as I didn't read anything properly) called for a LOT of egg whites so I went lazy-style and purchased a pint of Lucerne egg whites. People, I present the two nastiest things that have ever graced my kitchen:
Uggghhh. Grooooossss.
The canned bundagi weren't the awesome flashback to the streets of Korea Mike was hoping for, so he left the rest out for the squirrels, who ate them up. I expected more from those squirrels, and I know them to happily gobble up moldy hot dog buns. The egg whites might seem innocuous, and I certainly didn't expect them to be so revolting but I actually gagged when I measured them out. I don't know why, but egg whites have a very specific consistency and these didn't - well, ok they did, but it's not one I'm going to specifically name on the family website. They worked, but screw it, I'd rather separate 1,000 eggs than buy another pint of that slime.
And that's that. I changed the background of the site because the sharp contrast between black and white was making my eyes go wonky. I'm not thrilled with this layout but at least I'm not seeing double:) Cheers!
